Have you ever met a director? A friend of mine was on set for eight months, and after he got home was sitting in his living room with his wife, staring at the coffee table. After enough time, he finally said, "That would look better over there," pointing across the room. Then, he sat for a few moments, still staring at it.

His wife finally said, "Your crew's not here, Mr. Director. If you want the coffee table over there, get up and move it."

This perfectly explains directors. And probably explains why so many of them are divorced.